You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out — And That’s the Whole Point

Have you ever had that sinking feeling that everyone else has their life together — except you?

Like your friends are getting promotions, planning weddings, buying homes, while you're still figuring out how to fold a fitted sheet or remember to water your plants. If so, let me tell you something important:

You’re not behind. You’re just human.

We live in an age of constant comparison. Instagram reels show perfect vacations. LinkedIn updates make it seem like everyone is getting promoted to Vice President of Something Important. Even the people who swear they’re “just keeping it real” seem to be effortlessly thriving. It’s easy to feel like you missed a memo. Like maybe you’re the only one who didn’t get the blueprint for adulthood.

But here's a radical thought: What if the people who seem to have it all together… don’t?

What if we're all just figuring it out as we go?

The truth is, no one really knows what they're doing. Some people are just better at pretending. The more I talk to people — really talk, not just scroll past their highlight reels — the more I realize we’re all carrying quiet worries. About money. About love. About purpose. About whether we’re enough.

And yet, we're so quick to assume we're the only ones who haven’t cracked the code.

I used to think I needed to hit a certain set of milestones by a certain age. Graduate college. Find the perfect job. Get married. Buy a house. Have a kid. Be “successful” — whatever that means. But life has a way of rewriting your plans. Sometimes gently. Sometimes like a hurricane.

And somewhere along the way, I realized something that changed my life:

The goal isn’t to figure everything out. The goal is to stay curious while you try.

Let me ask you this — who decided that “figuring it out” means having a perfect job or a Pinterest-worthy apartment? Who decided that happiness comes with a six-figure salary and a color-coded Google Calendar?

What if your version of “figured out” looks totally different?

What if it’s messy? What if it’s creative? What if it’s nomadic, or quiet, or wildly unconventional?

There’s so much pressure to define success based on what other people are doing. But that’s like trying to bake a cake using someone else’s recipe when you’re missing half the ingredients. It won’t work. And even if it does, it won’t taste like you.

Maybe you’re still finding your voice. Maybe you’re starting over. Maybe you're in a season of healing, or unlearning, or just surviving. That doesn't make you lost. It makes you alive.

The beauty of life isn’t in having all the answers — it’s in asking the questions that matter.

Questions like:

What kind of life feels true to me?

What makes me feel most alive?

Who am I when no one’s watching?

If you’re still searching for your path, good. That means you’re not settling for someone else’s map.

It’s okay to take detours. To try things and walk away. To start something and not finish it. To change your mind. Growth is not linear. Healing is not a checklist. Purpose is not a one-size-fits-all.

You are allowed to be a masterpiece and a work-in-progress at the same time.

So if today you’re feeling a little lost — breathe. You’re not alone. And you’re not behind.

You’re just becoming. And that’s more than enough.